Building Resilience Takes Time, APA Says. Nobody Gets Stronger Reading About Push-Ups.

The American Psychological Association’s “Building your resilience” guide, first published in 2012 and last updated in 2020, says resilience can be learned. It offers practical steps grouped under four areas: connection, wellness, healthy thinking and meaning.¹

The guide isn’t new. Other outlets still repeat its framework, including a Psychology Today post and a University of Central Arkansas wellness handout.²³ It is general advice from APA and named expert contributors, including David Palmiter, Mary Alvord, Suniya S. Luthar and Richard G. Tedeschi. It does not cite a single study, so think of it as expert guidance, not proof that every step works.¹

APA defines resilience as adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats or significant stress, such as family and relationship problems, serious health problems, or workplace and financial stressors. The guide says it can be more than bouncing back. It can also involve profound personal growth.¹

Its most encouraging line is that resilience isn’t necessarily a personality trait only some people have. It involves behaviors, thoughts and actions anyone can learn. In APA’s words, research has shown that “resilience is ordinary, not extraordinary.”¹

The guide also says it won’t happen overnight: “Like building a muscle, increasing your resilience takes time and intentionality.”¹ The comparison holds up in at least one way. Nobody gets stronger by reading about push-ups.

Related: Breakfast, Sleep and Exercise Linked to Better Stress Coping in College Students

Seven steps you can start this week

1. Lean on the right people. APA suggests prioritizing relationships with trustworthy, compassionate people who validate your feelings. It also says to accept help and support from those who care about you. Civic groups, faith-based communities and other local organizations can offer support and hope too.¹

2. Look after your body. Proper nutrition, ample sleep, hydration and regular exercise can strengthen the body to adapt to stress, the guide says. APA also advises against using alcohol or drugs to mask pain.¹

3. Try a mindful habit. Journaling, yoga, prayer or meditation can help build connections and restore hope, according to APA.¹

4. Help someone else. This one sits in the guide’s section on finding purpose. Volunteering or supporting a friend can build a sense of purpose and self-worth.¹

5. Shrink the problem. APA recommends being proactive by breaking a big problem into manageable pieces. It also suggests setting small, realistic goals and looking for self-discovery along the way.¹

6. Keep things in proportion. The guide advises keeping things in perspective and avoiding catastrophizing, which means jumping to the worst possible outcome. It also suggests accepting that change is part of life, maintaining a hopeful outlook and learning from how you coped in the past.¹

7. Know when to call in a professional. If you can’t function as well as you’d like, or can’t perform basic daily activities after a stressful or traumatic experience, APA advises seeing a licensed mental health professional such as a psychologist.¹

You don’t have to do it all at once

Psychology Today notes that progress in the four areas doesn’t need to be equal or simultaneous.² So starting with one step is a reasonable place to begin.